Poetry Class

I wrote some haikus because I get bored at work. They go like this:

Lexy likes a girl
so he drives to dub-dub-c
and is never home.

You ate all my bread
so go me a six-pack
God fucking dammit!

Lexy's dad David
bought us electric blankets
now we sleep better.

Mike went for a ride
four hours all over, then
crashed in the driveway.

Lateef has a cane
and the adoration of
sorority girls.

Phil is our "Kimmy"
He doesn't live here but he
kinda sorta does.

Our recycling bins
are always overflowing--
we drink too much beer.

Megs, shut up, don't go
home yet, its only eight and
too early for bed.

Bikes bikes bikes bikes bikes
bikes bikes bikes bikes bikes bikes bikes
bikes bikes bikes bikes bikes.

Kylie thinks of Dan
and Lexy thinks of Christine
while Phil and Mike spoon.

Ahh, every morning
New York Times, eight cups coffee
all to myself. Nice.

Alex is Tina
also known as Alexis
she also lives here.

Alex is Tina
also know as Alexis
she wears micro clothes.
--(coutesty of Phil)

In the living room
A beer in my hand, I think
Dang, this ain't too bad.
--(also courtesy of Phil)

Sqeezing into pants
Holding my breath I zip up
on the town we go!
--(also courtesy of Phil, again)

The last two is in reference to Phil and Mike spending the evening trying on Tina and Kylie's jeans in preparation for this weekend's Hipster party. Which reminds me of one of my favorite quotes ever, from one of the best books ever:
"I'm so unhip its a wonder my bum stays on."
Last weekend the Floriduh kids came up for the Icycle. It was awesome. You should have been there.